jokes
Lion and Monkey

A monkey saw a lion sleeping in the jungle. Seeing the lion sleeping, the monkey thought of playing mischief with him. He slapped the lion and ran away. The lion's eye opened, he also ran after the monkey. The monkey ran quickly and entered into a park. People were busy reading newspapers sitting on benches in the park. The monkey also sat between the people by holding a newspaper. In the meantime, the lion came there gasping and stood beside the monkey and said.  "Have you seen any monkey here?"

The monkey said from behind the newspaper. "Are you asking about the monkey who slapped the lion and ran away?"

Hearing this, the lion got worried and spoke. "Has this news been published in the newspaper?"
Donkey

One day a donkey was going somewhere. He saw a bale of cloth lying on the road. He opened the bale immediately. There was a lion's skin in that bale. He was very happy after seeing the skin of lion. Then he wore this skin of lion.

There was a pond nearby. He went to this pond for seeing his reflection. When he saw his reflection, he was very happy because now he looked exactly like a lion.

"Now I will teach a lesson to all those who used to make fun of me." The donkey thought this and walked towards the forest.

The donkey entered the forest with great arrogance. First the deer saw this lion-like donkey. His body started trembling with fear and he immediately ran away from there.

"How much fun?" The donkey said to himself, rejoicing at his success.

Meanwhile, a fox came there. When she saw the lion-like donkey, she too began to tremble with fear. She fell down at the donkey's feet and started begged him for her life: "Sir! You are a very compassionate animal, do not eat me."

Then soon the news of the arrival of the lion spread throughout the forest. The monkeys started jumping from one tree to another in fear and the rabbits started hiding in their burrows.

"Now I must roar like a lion and frighten them." The donkey said to himself.

Then he roared like a lion. But in his roar, a different sound (like a donkey) came out.  All the animals heard this sound and came out quickly. It didn't take them long to find out the origin of the donkey. They immediately understood that it was a donkey dressed in a tiger's skin. Therefore, after knowing the origin of the donkey, all the animals together beat the donkey very much. 

After that, the donkey repented that he would not bother the forest animals anymore.

Life is so beautiful.

A leopard was preparing to smoke marijuana in the forest when suddenly a mouse passed by and spoke. "O leopard, Life is so beautiful, don't ruin it. How beautiful is the forest, let's go for a walk. Let's have fun."

The leopard liked the mouse talk. He gave up his intention to smoke marijuana and walked with him. When they went a little further, they saw an elephant trying to open a bottle of wine. The mouse said again. "Hey Uncle Elephant, what are you doing? Life is so beautiful, don't ruin it. How beautiful is the forest, let's go for a walk. Let's have fun."

The elephant also liked the mouse talk. He gave up his intention to drink wine and walked with the mouse and leopard. Going further, they saw that the lion was preparing to intoxicate heroin. The mouse also went to him and spoke. "O king of the forest, life is so beautiful. Don't ruin it like that, love it. Let's take a tour of the forest."

The lion looked at the mouse angrily and slapped him hard. The elephant and the leopard were very surprised. They asked the lion. "Lion sir, the mouse said a good thing. Why did you slap him?"

The lion answered. "This miscreant came yesterday also intoxicated with hemp and he rotate me for five hours in forest by saying the same thing."
Lion, Dog and Monkey

Once upon a time that a dog forgot way in the forest. He was just thinking something when he heard the roar of a lion. The dog thought in his heart. "Today, death is certain."

Suddenly he saw the skeleton of a dead animal near him. Then the next moment he thought a trick. He pulled out a bone from the skeleton and caught it in his teeth. In the meantime, the lion came very close from rear of the dog. The dog bravely ignored the presence of the lion and started hitting mouth on the bone and growled and said to himself. "Lion hunting has its own fun. If one more lion is found, the fun will be doubled."

When the lion heard this from the dog, the ground gave way under his feet and he ran away from there immediately. A monkey was sitting on a tree watching the whole scene. He said to the dog. "Well, you have fooled the lion, I will tell him everything right now."

The dog stopped the monkey a lot, but he did not stop. He went to the lion's lair and he told everything to the lion. Hearing the monkey's words, the lion became furious. He roared. "Well that's it. Come on with me, I'll teach this dog a lesson right now."

So when the lion reached there with the monkey, he saw that the dog was sitting with his back towards him and speaking loudly. "I am suffering from hunger. How long has this monkey cub gone to fetch the lion has not yet returned?"

Hearing this, the lion ran away again.
Lion, Fox and Jackal

One day the lion went out to hunt. Fox and jackal also joined him. In a short time, lion hunted a donkey, a deer and a rabbit. Then he said to jackal. "Mr. Jackal, divide this hunting."

Jackal said, pointing to the donkey. "This is biggest part, you eat it, I take deer and fox has right over rabbit."

Hearing this, the lion got angry. He gave jackal a strong slap. Jackal lost one of his eyes due to this slap. After that lion said to fox. "Now you divide."

Division of fox was very interesting. She spoke. "Rabbit is for your breakfast, deer will be suitable for your lunch and donkey will be better for your dinner."

Hearing this, lion was very happy. He asked the fox happily. "Well done fox, where did you learn such a good distribution?"

Fox replied. "With one eye of jackal."
Cockroaches

Two cockroaches were sitting in a corner talking. One cockroach said. "What should I tell you brother? Bad time has come. Someone wretched has opened a hotel in the building above. I have fallen ill looking at the dishes that shine like silver, the cleanly washed floors and the shiny new chairs. Now will have to settle somewhere else."

"Repentance," said the second cockroach. "living in such a dirty place is severely harmful to health."
Bear and Frog

A bear and a frog were going into the forest. Suddenly they saw a bird trapped in a bush and crying for help. Together they freed the bird.  As soon as the bird became free, it became a fairy.

At first the fairy thanked both of them. Then she spoke. “I will fulfill your desires according to the size of both of you. Since the bear is big, it can make two wishes and the frog is small, so it can only make one wish." 

Hearing this, the bear jumped with joy and immediately spoke. "I want to be the king of the whole forest."

The fairy shook the stick and said. "From today you are the king of the whole forest. Now tell me your second wish." 

The bear spoke. "Change the gender of all male bears to female bears, so that there should be only sows (female bears) for me in the whole forest and let there be none to enjoy them but me.” 

The fairy shook her stick and also fulfilled this wish of the bear.  Now the fairy turned to the frog and said "Now you tell me your only wish." 

The frog was very angry with the bear. He didn't like the gender change of the bears. So, he stated his only wish. "You make this bear a eunuch."

So, the fairy shook the stick and made the bear eunuch.
A conversation between donkeys

Two donkeys were talking. First donkey spoke in a sad tone. “My master is very cruel. Gives very little grass to eat, takes more work and also beats a lot.”

"My situation is also exactly like yours." Second donkey also said in a sad tone. Then after a short pause he spoke again. "Friend, why don't we leave our masters and run away to the forest. There we will live a life of luxury. There will be plenty of green grass to eat and cool water from the stream to drink. There will also be no one to beat us in the forest."

First donkey said. "Sorry friend, I cannot leave my master.”

"But why?" Asked the second donkey in surprise.

First donkey said. “I am staying here hoping for a bright and golden future. Actually, my master's daughter is very beautiful. This beautiful girl does not pay attention in study and she also does a lot of mischief. A week ago, her father had told her that if she did not pass the exam this time too and if she did not stop the mischief, he would marry her to a donkey. Now, I am staying here hoping to marry this beautiful girl.”